finally i can stop complaining about how fat i am coz..well, i have no excuse now do i? well, that's debatable.
Point is, i have joined the gym and since Monday (yes, 3 days) i have been there first thing every morning getting my treadmill (20min) and StairMaster (10min) on.
oh, and Its not fun. Actually, scratch that, it fucken sucks ass. and it hurts like hell the first few weeks/months/forever.
And you know what's worse? The fact that i totally feel entitled to eat all the shit under the sun. You know, before i joined and started going to the gym, i was being all "oh, i can't eat that coz i am not doing any exercise", but now, i work out every morning (3 days mind u) and I'm all "oh, i can eat that coz I'm working out now", and then its fried chicken for lunch, pasta for dinner (Monday) and chocolate brownies at 10pm.
oh and a whole kitkat peanut butter. Shit man. I don't know whats worse, not going to the gym and suffering or bloody eating like a rabbit.
ugh. fat if i do. fat if i don't.
In other News:
There's been a new development in my life the last few days (that explains the last post) and i didn't feel like blogging about it A. and B. i haven't really stopped to really examine it in full depth. but basically this is it..I'M SINGLE AGAIN
Now, i mean, there could be a lot of explanations and long ass stories from a lot of people as to how this happened or why but the bottom line is..I GOT DUMPED.
yup. I WAS DUMPED.
Now, look, i can honestly say that i have not allowed myself to be sad about this. I mean, i really like editor boy, and he still wanted to hold my hand and squeeze me and cuddle me and whatnot even after this, but at the end there he blind-sided me and this i don't know where i'm at on it.
U know what, I'm mostly just disappointed he ended it the way he did. Because i don't doubt he's a great guy. he is. and he's smart and funny and really good in bed. But still, a phone call at 11.30pm on saturday and that's it? The explanation i asked for was declined.
"i don't want to hurt you"...yup, but calling me while I'm asleep (yes i was asleep at 11.30pm on Saturday..don't judge y'all) is not gonna hurt my feelings is it? and then not answering and not returning my call(s) won't make me feel really crappy?
I'm feeling a little like Carrie when she got dumped on a post-it.
Except I'm not particularly angry, like i said, I'm disappointed that he went and behaved like the kind of guy that broke my heart the last time i dated.
The one thing i can be sure of is that there will be no tears shed here. Not.Gonna.Happen.
I just have to say. What's a girl gotta do around here to get an honest guy. I mean, I'm not gonna start to say horrible things about him because he dumped me. I know he's a nice guy, and i really had a great time with him.
Really though. I mean, I'm not one of those people who gives my heart really quickly, or dives right into the realm of a man who so much as shows interest in me, but we just clicked. And to be honest, out of all the men I've met here in Lagos, he seemed the most honest and sweet. And so you'll forgive me if this has come as somewhat of a shock. Yea, yea, we weren't "together" for that long, but what was, felt like years. Sad. I.Know.
Maybe i just.didn't.know.him.
One the bright side, 13 days till i don't have to work here anymore!
oh, and I'm single again...
*unwritten*
3 comments:
That sucks hun! But honestly, what's with the midnight call to end things... tad bit dramatic and unecessary. As for waiting for closure, it never seems to come when you want it, trust me.
Keep strong :-)
Sorry about the breakup, It's his loss anyway!
And stop giving yourself a hard time about the eating! Look at it this way, you are already going to the gym, in my books, that's good enough!
We miss you in logsville. update your blog.
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