the one where i went to jozi..and took my baggage with me..

Its me!!!!

how is everyone doing?! I mean, i have to confess though, i know how everyone is doing coz well...i've just caught up on my blog reading!
Man, i feel like my life is one big YAWN compared to all yall!

Ok, so first things first, i just got back from jozi, i was there over the weekend. Ugh, as much as i heart jozi, i feel like i have to write a personal email to M.N. (mother nature)...seriously, the summer clothes are out, and im there to cause some serious damage to my under utilised credit card (imagine??--well, that's what happens when you live in Nigeria and cant use the Internet to purchase things and all you can do is resort to watching eBay auctions and wish you were bidding, but instead pick a team and hope that zero-pounds from Virginia gets the Versace dress!) and the weather is a measly 19degrees and its raining. Ugh.
But that didn't stop me from drinking alcohol like a college kid and dancing like i was alone in my room pretending to be Cameron Diaz in Charlies Angels (formal apology to all those who had to witness this..really, I'm truly sorry).

Because i only get to go shopping in jozi maybe once every two months or so, i am meticulous with my plan. I hit up Eastgate...and then head to the Rose. I hit up the Truworths and the Woolworths and Y.D.E and boutiques first...and then when i see that i only have R500 between me and walking back to OR Tambo Int Airport i head straight for MR PRICE where i spend every last dime and come out of there with double what i got in the other stores and 10kg excess baggage...i love travelling alone and doing things like this alone. Its so theraputic i reckon

This time though, was a little different for me...i came with my own extra baggage (not counting the F*cking 6 kilos i've gained in the last 3 months---even though I've been hittin the gym every other other day or so...ish)...i brought another human being with me...THE BOYF.

Now, listen, this is the first time i have ever travelled with a significant other...and i think it went pretty well. Let me re-phrase that... we only had 3 awkward moments...2 squabbles (read: arguments that could have escalated into huge fights if we weren't in another country and in the presence of other normal human beings)...got lost twice and i discovered 2 MAJOR personality flaws about the boyf.

Yup. I travelled with the boyf. Now, bear in mind, we have only been together for almost 3 months and things have been moving pretty fast. So, here's how this came about.

I say "oh man, i have 3 weddings coming up and i totally need to go shopping, not to mention, i need to get out of Lagos"....the boyf: "awesome, i'll come with you!"...me: "hahahahahahaha" the boyf: "cool, shall we stay with my brother or a hotel or your friends??"... first realisation about the boyf: HE'S A PLANNER!!

Now, I'm not sure if any of you have ever travelled with a significant other, but this being my first time, i was way out of my comfort zone. We left Lagos on wed last week and got back Sunday evening, but i only finally relaxed around Sunday morning!!

There were just too many things to deal with, and i was constantly having (mental) freak outs every hour.
I mean, we had a blast and I'm sure he really enjoyed himself with me but i wonder how relaxed he was. He got to meet my (judgey) South African and Zimbabwean pals and i got to meet his (judgey--i assume) brother who lives in jozi.

Now, this brother of his lives in Morningside, and he INSISTED (read: practically blackmailed and put a gun to my head) that we stay at his place for one night. That wasn't the worst bit though...nope. He lives with his Ethiopian (beautiful) girlfriend.
Now, we show up at their house on our last night in jozi (saturday) and i immediately notice the elephant in the room...these two were embroiled in the biggest fight i have ever not been a part of. (just as a side note, i had met them the night before and immediately made the mental observation that HE is WAAAAY more in love with this girl than she is with him)
Anyway, so we show up and they aren't even talking to each other. GREAT. So we go into our room and i look at the Boyf with my all-knowing-wise-ass look and say "and u think this is gonna be fun?"..in retrospect, this was not a wise thing for me to say. The last thing we needed was for us to be fighting and our hosts to be near killing each other.

Anywho, (this is a long story but i have to share...i cant believe i lived through this), we had planned to go to a party that The brothers' close friend was throwing...fair enough. Needless to say, the boyf's brother and his Mrs are not even talking and are using the boyf and i to communicate. I have to say, the tension was getting to me, so i pulled the boyf aside at the party and told him this was making me uncomfortable...he didn't seem phased at all. "you're gonna have to grin and bear it coz we're staying with them and my brother really loves this girl"

So, at like 3 we leave the party and the Future sister in law is driving coz the boys were wasted...and im in the passenger seat in front..she turns to me and says.. in a voice louder than is necessary "You guys are more than welcome to have sex in our house, it'll be the first hard on and real orgasm in the house in three months"...Needless to say i didn't say A THING. Meanwhile, alcohol fuelled boyf (mine) in the back laughs REALLY loud and says oh please, girl, maybe u should shave your mustache and he'll be attracted to you ha?!

Second realisation about the boyf: HE JUST HAS TO HAS, TO HAS TO SPEAK WHEN I NEED HIM TO SHUT THE FUCK UP...EVEN IF ITS TRUE...

ps.. YES...we did have sex--incase you were wondering.



All in all the trip was fun...and we had a blast. Apart from the "babe-you're gonna spend R700 on shoes?" and "babe, I'm hungry" (every 2 hours) "babe ugh, is there a chair in here" and "babe, the first one you tried on was the nicest one"..the boyf and i really had a bonding experience and i completely appreciated his amazing need to take care of me and make me laugh and not stop me from spending insane amounts of money at Nine West, and making my (judgey) friends laugh.


oh boy...i think I'm in love.

*UNWRITTEN*