random rant uno

thank you for being a friend. Travel down the road and back again. Your heart is true, you're a pal and a confidant. And if you threw a party, and invited everyone you knew, you would see the biggest gift would be from me and the card attached would say...thank you for being a friend.

OK, so I've been thinking a lot about friendship lately. Well, really, since last night. I got a call from one of my really really good pals bumble bee last night. We laughed, we cried and boy did we catch up. Sometimes facebook is not enough. It was just a really lovely 3hour phone call, considering time diff she's a champ for not going straight to bed after a big night.

Anywho, the point is, started thinking about friends and friendship and the people i hang with here. I am one of those people who really has a core group of friends (3) and they mean the world to me. We can go for months without speaking and yet when we meet up/ call we are back to the same jokes and laughter. I love these girls.

I also have major trust issues.

So, i moved to this scary new city, and the people i did know from here are all overseas (just my luck), so i started hanging out with a crew that's a little older than me. Their all in their late mid twenties (25/6/7). There's demi, tila and ginger. I mean, its not like they are bad people but they just have a knack for making feel like a complete outsider. Technically i am, because I'm not Nigerian, but neither are ginger and tila, but they seem to fit right in. Now, I'm not a fucking snobby ass girl, i am really open (not in that way perv) and really friendly. Its true, i love meeting people and they know that, because that's how i met them.

It just annoys me. They behave so clicky. Like "oh, we're so exclusive" blah blah. Even

Even though i do have fun (drunken) times with them, this group of girls has reminded me that...

1. 
   
   i prefer having male friends, a lot of girls (not all of them) that i attempt to be friends with gravitate towards that stupid behind-the-back talk and bitchiness.




2. 
   
   i am not the type of person who needs a whole bunch of friends or people around me to make me feel special

Case in point. Yesterday. Now demi has been on a long trip and she obviously feels really great, and she obviously has a lot to catch up on and all. So, i spoke to her on Monday the day after she got back and she's all, yea lets do dinner blah blah. So, is it just me, or when someone says that, and says "I'll let you know", they are supposed to call/text/facebook/email wateva and let everyone else know when and where? And being that this demi is one of those people who if u so much as sneeze she wants to know when and where--she at least wants an invite. So...i waited. And out of my good naturedness, texted her (in between texting editor boy) and asked her when the big catch up was.."oh, not sure yet"..OK.

This morning, i get a call from tila "hey...yea, demi and i had dinner last night, why didn't you come??" yea. OK.

I don't see why people need to waste time, lets just get shit out in the open. Look, I'm not a bad person, i think people just don't understand how i can be so honest sometimes. If i don't feel like hanging out, i''ll tell you, look, I'm not feeling it. No excuses. Easy. But it would be really nice if these people would stop acting like I'm a charity case. I am not. Let me tell you, i would rather be alone at home with a DVD than out with people who are being fake towards me because they feel bad if they don't take me with them. Really, I'm not a charity case. Seriously, I'll be fine thanks.

I have three really good pals who are gorgeous girls who love love me, and i heart heart back. You know why, coz we keep it real with each other. That's what friendship is about.

so why don't i just stop hanging out with them? I don't know man.

fuck.

*unwritten*